Post by Jesse on Apr 11, 2015 19:05:34 GMT -5
......that are kind of fucked up if you think about it. In memory of James Best (Roscoe P. Coltrane)
10-The Chickasaw County Police. I believe police are allowed to cross jurisdictions when in pursuit of a perpetrator. The Dukes routinely find a safe haven in Chickasaw County when the Hazzard police are on their trail.
9-Daisy is a manipulative dick-tease. She uses her looks to get what she wants from...well, pretty much everybody, but especially Enos. She's actually a total fucking bitch towards him. Constantly flirting with the poor guy (who is clearly special needs) and, at least twice, agreed to marry him only to back out at the last minute. While we're on Daisy, let's face it, she really wasn't all that hot, she was "Hazzard County Hot". I mean, who were the other good looking women on "Dukes Of Hazzard" to compare her to? Sure, she had great legs and liked to show them off, wore a loose-fitting top unbuttoned down to the cleavage and shorts cut-off to see a good quarter-moon of ass cheek. But put her on the set of "Charlie's Angels" and she doesn't even stand out among the extras.
8-Where did Coy and Vance come from and where did they go? They just sort of showed up one episode and were gone the following season. The writers never bothered to mention where they came from, where they were or where they went. And who's fucking car is the General Lee anyhow? When Bo and Luke left, wouldn't they take it with them?
7-How many Dukes are there? Ok, you got cousins Bo, Luke, Daisy, Coy and Vance. All last named Duke so there's 5 brothers right there. Jesse is everybody's Uncle and no one's Father, so there's 6 brothers, plus, there was at least one episode with another Duke cousin. 7 brothers? I guess.
6-Daisy's the only Duke with a job. You know, the center of Hazzard Borough looks like a thriving little town, if Bo and Luke (or Coy and Vance) got a job at one of those businesses and paid Uncle Jesse some room and board once in a while, Jesse wouldn't be in danger of losing the family farm every other episode. But I guess they are too busy driving around aimlessly and snooping into Boss Hogg's business deals (however shady they may be) to work 9-5.
5-Why are they all at Uncle Jesse's in the first place? That's never really explained. Where are their parents? and, again, they are in their mid 20's, GET A JOB!
4-Uncle Jesse Plowing with a mule. Seriously? This is the late 1970's and early 1980's. 100 horsepower tractors and 5 bottom plows are the norm for even small farms like the Dukes. Uncle Jesse's got a one bottom plow behind an old mule plowing ground. Then Daisy comes into the picture with a tractor that has a picnic basket in the front-end loader with his lunch. Fucked up. No wonder you're about to lose your farm again Uncle Jesse, you dipshit!
3-Cooter should be a millionaire. Think about it, all those car wrecks and Cooter's is the only auto body shop in town. Hell, he should've been able to retire after season three just fixing up the police cars!
2- The Duke farm has no driveway. I'm dead serious. Never noticed this as a kid, but as an adult, I watch the reruns on CMT and EVERY time someone is coming to or leaving the Duke farm, they drive across the grass. There is no lane! Check it out next time you get a chance.
1-Skinny dipping. I'm pretty close to my cousins, but skinny dipping with another male cousin? I think not. I think there were at least 2 episodes where Bo and Luke go skinny-dippy in the local lake. I guess that's the kind of shit you do with your cousins when you don't have a job. I mean, if Daisy were involved, ok, I can see that. I dunno, Bo and Luke just seem way too comfortable being naked around each other. And that's kind of fucked up if you think about it.
10-The Chickasaw County Police. I believe police are allowed to cross jurisdictions when in pursuit of a perpetrator. The Dukes routinely find a safe haven in Chickasaw County when the Hazzard police are on their trail.
9-Daisy is a manipulative dick-tease. She uses her looks to get what she wants from...well, pretty much everybody, but especially Enos. She's actually a total fucking bitch towards him. Constantly flirting with the poor guy (who is clearly special needs) and, at least twice, agreed to marry him only to back out at the last minute. While we're on Daisy, let's face it, she really wasn't all that hot, she was "Hazzard County Hot". I mean, who were the other good looking women on "Dukes Of Hazzard" to compare her to? Sure, she had great legs and liked to show them off, wore a loose-fitting top unbuttoned down to the cleavage and shorts cut-off to see a good quarter-moon of ass cheek. But put her on the set of "Charlie's Angels" and she doesn't even stand out among the extras.
8-Where did Coy and Vance come from and where did they go? They just sort of showed up one episode and were gone the following season. The writers never bothered to mention where they came from, where they were or where they went. And who's fucking car is the General Lee anyhow? When Bo and Luke left, wouldn't they take it with them?
7-How many Dukes are there? Ok, you got cousins Bo, Luke, Daisy, Coy and Vance. All last named Duke so there's 5 brothers right there. Jesse is everybody's Uncle and no one's Father, so there's 6 brothers, plus, there was at least one episode with another Duke cousin. 7 brothers? I guess.
6-Daisy's the only Duke with a job. You know, the center of Hazzard Borough looks like a thriving little town, if Bo and Luke (or Coy and Vance) got a job at one of those businesses and paid Uncle Jesse some room and board once in a while, Jesse wouldn't be in danger of losing the family farm every other episode. But I guess they are too busy driving around aimlessly and snooping into Boss Hogg's business deals (however shady they may be) to work 9-5.
5-Why are they all at Uncle Jesse's in the first place? That's never really explained. Where are their parents? and, again, they are in their mid 20's, GET A JOB!
4-Uncle Jesse Plowing with a mule. Seriously? This is the late 1970's and early 1980's. 100 horsepower tractors and 5 bottom plows are the norm for even small farms like the Dukes. Uncle Jesse's got a one bottom plow behind an old mule plowing ground. Then Daisy comes into the picture with a tractor that has a picnic basket in the front-end loader with his lunch. Fucked up. No wonder you're about to lose your farm again Uncle Jesse, you dipshit!
3-Cooter should be a millionaire. Think about it, all those car wrecks and Cooter's is the only auto body shop in town. Hell, he should've been able to retire after season three just fixing up the police cars!
2- The Duke farm has no driveway. I'm dead serious. Never noticed this as a kid, but as an adult, I watch the reruns on CMT and EVERY time someone is coming to or leaving the Duke farm, they drive across the grass. There is no lane! Check it out next time you get a chance.
1-Skinny dipping. I'm pretty close to my cousins, but skinny dipping with another male cousin? I think not. I think there were at least 2 episodes where Bo and Luke go skinny-dippy in the local lake. I guess that's the kind of shit you do with your cousins when you don't have a job. I mean, if Daisy were involved, ok, I can see that. I dunno, Bo and Luke just seem way too comfortable being naked around each other. And that's kind of fucked up if you think about it.
